TV Cream

Films: C is for...

Conqueror, The

In a film where John Wayne is acted off the screen by his fake ‘tache there’s not much to be had here. It’s bad in the Footballer’s Wives sense; that being, not ‘so-bad-its-good’ but actually ‘so-bad-it’s-bloody-awful’. Agnes ‘Endora’ Moorhead and Lee ‘Nimble’ Van Cleef are dire an’ all, so he’s not alone at least. It’s often commented of this film that, spookily, this was filmed where atomic tests had taken place and there were a lot of the cast who died subsequently of cancer. In fact they actually died of acute embarrassment.

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