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Bottle Boys

OH DEAR GOD. Fucking awful dairy-com with cheeky-arsed twat ROBIN ASKWITH as a milkman with only one thing on his mind. The answer not being to deliver a quality comedy show. Usual LWT cliche bollocks on display (token Scotsman, token black, token dopey woman, token punk). One episode involved Robin meeting Mrs T. Remarkably, it made you feel sorry for Thatcher.



  1. Applemask

    August 9, 2009 at 12:57 am

    Unsurprisingly written by Vince Fucking Powell. Somehow got two series. Askwith role originally written for rich man’s Robin Askwith, Jim Davidson. Most famous clip involves Askwith and Richard “Any questions? Splendid” Davies in a discussion about a woman whose bottle caps are being broken by “her tits”, ho ho FUCKING ho. Askwith has the decency to look embarrassed; Davies, who actually has to deliver the double-entendre himself, comes across as genuinely furious at having to do this shit.

  2. Lee James Turnock

    April 30, 2010 at 5:34 pm

    I had the displeasure of watching a couple of episodes a while back, and one episode ended with the announcement “Robin Askwith is currently appearing in…blah blah…at London’s such and such theatre”. As if anyone gave a stuff.

  3. Glenn A

    May 9, 2010 at 11:15 pm

    It was shown against Live Aid: when Bob Geldof announced 90 pc of the world’s televisions were tuned to Live Aid, I bet a lot of them switched over to the Bobfest to escape this. It was made in 1985, but seemed to look as if it was made in 1972 and, unlike the gloriously un PC and funny sitcoms of that era, was yes totally un PC but totally unfunny. One episode feature a tarty secretary in a PVC mini skirt and stockings who acted to type. Nina Myskow hated it and for once I had to agree with her.

  4. Adrian

    May 10, 2010 at 9:29 am

    “ROBIN ASKWITH as a milkman with only one thing on his mind.”

    That would be milk, presumably?

  5. Chris Diamond

    May 10, 2010 at 1:57 pm

    At the time, I loved this. In my defence, I’ll say it was more to do with the animated titles and the time slot than anything else. Except maybe Richard Davies. Having just read Powell’s pretty poor autobiography (notable only for having a star on the cover with Wilfred Pickle’s name in it) I can confirm he makes no mention of it.

  6. Arthur Nibble

    May 10, 2010 at 3:33 pm

    I remember this most for the buxom secretary, played by Eve Ferret!

  7. Chris Jones

    May 11, 2010 at 10:27 am

    Eve Ferrett did something apart from appearing on ‘Through the Keyhole’ every week?

  8. Glenn A

    May 15, 2010 at 7:07 pm

    The last gasp for Vince Powell and the more earthy charms of the old school LWT. However, this being the mid eighties and the high yuppie years, ITV wanted to find a more intelligent and affluent viewer and Bottle Boys, along with World of Sport, attracted what they would call the wrong demographic and it never returned. Maybe because it was total cod was another reason.

  9. Glenn A

    November 5, 2012 at 11:20 pm

    Actually have managed to see a few clips, particularly the notorious t!2s one and Askwith in a chicken suit, and it’s not as bad as I thought and has a sort of so bad it’s good appeal in a way the Jim Davidson sitcoms of the same era don’t. Actually a person on the net managed, I don’t know how, to get nine off air recordings from ITV of the show and said Bottle Boys veered from the awful to the amusing in a fashion and it really has to be admired for being the last bastion of political incorrectness, though it is a bit more subtle than Love Thy Neighbour( this being 1985). Also fair play to Chris Diamond for defending this reviled sitcom.

  10. Martin Briggs

    January 2, 2015 at 9:05 pm

    Just had the pleasure of watching the classic episode ‘one good turn’ and I have to say that this is some of the finest comedy I have ever seen. Askwith is on top form and the subtlety of the gags is delivered with expert timing to maximum effect.

    The only downside was that the audience weren’t treat to the sight of Askwith’s spotty arse pumping away while he shot his yogurt up a dolly bird while gurning and saying ‘crikey’

  11. THX 1139

    June 17, 2016 at 9:39 pm

    I just watched that One Good Turn episode too, and the fact that it features both Robin Askwith doing a Bernie Winters impersonation and Bernie Winters doing a Bernie Winters impersonation was weird enough to raise a laugh. Just the one, mind.

  12. Glenn Aylett

    September 2, 2018 at 3:05 pm

    Dear pld Bernie Winters, along with his brother Mike, he was considered the top of the comedy tree with Morecambe and Wise in the sixties. Problem was, neither were very funny, Morecambe and Wise were joined by an even funnier duo( The Two Ronnies) in the early seventies, and their star rapidly descended. Bottle Boys was probably the last TV outing for Bernie Winters, as after he fell out with his brother in 1978 and his solo career was a flop, he probably needed the money.

  13. Droogie

    March 18, 2021 at 7:39 am

    I watched the 1971 movie of The Canterbury Tales by Pasolini recently and had a shock. I’ve seen Robin Askwith’s bum countless times, but never his wedding tackle. That was changed by an unforgettable scene in this film where he urinates from the balcony of an inn onto the unfortunate punters below. Tom Baker later shows up in a nude scene too and also shows his sonic screwdriver!

    • THX 1139

      March 18, 2021 at 10:16 am

      I tell you, Robin Askwith has had a surprisingly diverse career for someone typed as an arse out comedy specialist. Despite the short shrift given him here, he’s a top bloke with an excellent perspective on his remarkable life.

    • Sidney Balmoral James

      March 18, 2021 at 10:06 pm

      Pasolini is reputed to have said to Askwith on meeting him, that ‘you look like you use your cock a lot’ Slightly strange choice of words, even from the man who would give us Salo. Perhaps it’s a customary Italian greeting. Although ‘you look like you use your arse a lot’ would have been more understandable given its relentless appearances in glorious Eastmancolour.

  14. Droogie

    March 18, 2021 at 12:42 pm

    Yeah – his Tweets are very entertaining. He shared a great photo recently of him wearing a t-shirt with Brian Jones of The Stones on who he shared an uncanny resemblance with way back.

  15. Richardpd

    March 18, 2021 at 10:27 pm

    I remember Robin being interviewed (I think on Doing Rude Things or that Joan Bakewell programme on censorship) about the Confessions films, mentioning that they were a lot less fun to film than they look, with the romp in soap suds being particularly uncomfortable, but at least explains the redness of his rear end.

  16. Glenn Aylett

    March 21, 2021 at 12:42 pm

    The sort of sitcom that only LWT could make and which John Birt was very glad to cancel after its second run in 1985. ITV at the time was being squeezed by a resurgent BBC One and also by Channel 4, which had taken some of the more niche ITV programmes and was taking 10{30e2395aaf6397fd02d2c79d91a1fe7cbb73158454674890018aee9c53a0cb96} of the audience, and had an audience that one ITV executive referred to as old and downmarket. This meant the axe was swung on old school variety shows, World of Sport, bawdy sitcoms and Crossroads.

  17. Tom Ronson

    April 27, 2021 at 12:27 am

    I’ve heard rumours that London Weekend Television’s top brass knew this was a stinker pretty much from the get-go, but it was pulling in ten million viewers so they were more or less forced to keep it going. Eventually, one episode was broadcast on the same evening as Live Aid just as Queen were taking the stage. Ratings for that edition were understandably dismal, and LWT had the excuse they needed to pull the plug.
    Several episodes made it to YouTube a few years ago, and although most of the cast give it their best shot and there’s a typically vocal eighties light entertainment audience who’d probably howl with laughter if you burned their houses down, there’s really no excuse for how thin and lazy the scripts are.
    Askwith, however, has earned a place in heaven for sharing that baffling photo on Twitter of Windsor Davies hiding in a wardrobe for some reason.

  18. Richardpd

    March 24, 2024 at 12:26 pm

    3-2-1 was another victim of ITV clearout in the late 1980s, much to the annoyance of Ted Rogers. The first run of The Price Is Right ended around the same time, but that was due to issues with the amount of prizes they were giving away. Luckily Bullseye was still popular to last until 1995.

  19. Glenn Aylett

    March 24, 2024 at 12:50 pm

    Crossroads was the biggest and best known victim of the purge of downmarket programmes at ITV in the eighties. Central had wanted to cancel the soap since they took over from ATV in 1982, but it still had reasonable enough ratings and was cheap to make, so lingered on until 1987 when falling ratings and Central research showing the Crossroads audience was too downmarket to attract good advertising revenue saw it given the heave ho. Also Crossroads was taking up too much studio space and Central were downsizing their studios in Birmingham, so this was another excuse. I did read years ago the money saved from axeing Crossroads went into launching Inspector Morse, which attracted the affluent demo Crossroads lacked.

    • George White

      March 24, 2024 at 9:03 pm

      IRONIC THAT Endeavour would confirm that Crossroads and Morse share the same universe.

  20. Richardpd

    March 24, 2024 at 10:07 pm

    Crossroads seemed to die a slow death after Noele Gordon was more or less sacked from the show.

    At least Inspector Morse proved to be a good investment with the money saved.

  21. Droogie

    June 13, 2024 at 6:38 am

    Wonderful to see Robin Askwith perform in a successful and critically acclaimed TV comedy tonight with his appearance as himself in the final episode of Inside No. 9. He sends himself up brilliantly ( and bares his arse.) Anyone deserved better than Bottle Boys and it’s good to see Robin in a better place and still looking like an elegantly wasted rockstar.

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