“They’re back, tougher than ever!” They must have had some dinner, then. Considering the palaver Regan caused at the end of the...
The first big screen outing for Thaw and Waterman, and the exclamation mark should provide adequate warning. (Also note the rationing of...
This mammoth, 2 1/2 hour Bob Fosse musical is high ’60s camp all the way through, jam packed with colourisation, crash zooms...
Burt Lancaster splishes across the pools of various old mates, his life unravelling in a cod-symbolic manner all the while. One of...
More ‘Enery-the-Eighthery. This time James Robertson ‘bleeding time’ Justice dons the beard and padding for the tale of Mary, Queen of Scots,...
Also-ran Arthurian whimsy from Disney’s post-Xerox machine “thick black outline” period, which always looked a bit cheap and tatty compared to the...
A bewigged Miles “Graham Norton stooge” O’Keefe beheads unjolly green giant Sean Connery in this notorious “just a flesh wound” ’80s Arthurian...
Olly Reed heads a bunch of native south coast mod lads (among them David ‘Blowup’ Hemmings, John ‘Father’ Alderton, Derek ‘Brother’ Nimmo...
A forty minute wonder that distills the scaremongering essence of the many ‘don’t talk to strangers’ films which were shown in school...
Cliff Richard moved his film career on from the days of Una Stubbs and Summer Holiday with this wondrously frothy confection, which...
‘Shit! Piss! Fuck!’ Walter Matthau contends with subway train hijackers while Martin Balsam contends with an attack of the snifles in this...
Lurid EC Comics stories are the source material here. A cowled Ralph Richardson predicts the grisly demises of five visitors to his...
A ninety-minute longeur in which various ballet dancers (yes, that’s Wayne Sleep as Squirrel Nutkin) put on outsized, hideous animal heads with...
A three-piece Corman Poe portmanteau, decorously worn by Vincent Price, who in the first fights with Maggie Pierce over his wife’s death,...
Hammer veteran Freddie Francis oversaw the death throes of the British portmanteau’s glory days with this frightfully silly Asylum-esque effort for World...
Yul Brynner is great thundering around in his non-descript accent as a Cossack chief leaping off of horses and chucking knives around...
‘Does snuff exist?’ ponders Channel Four, passim. Well, yes it does, it’s here, and it’s rated A. Screenwriter Gerald Durrell and director...
“I thought you could get pregnant while by walking along a canal path while someone on the other side played the harmonica!”...
Looking for a Michael Crichton adaptation worse than Runaway? Look no further! George Segal is the epileptic computer tec given a brain-mounted...
How come no-one mentions this film when debating the Precise Point Hollywood Films Went Crap? Anyway, there’s nothing left to say about...
Norman J Warren. The no-budget exploitation mogul has particular significance, as his oeuvre marks the exact point where the Right Kind of...
It’s not really a glam film, is That’ll, being set in the ’50s, but it does come from David Puttnam’s Goodtimes Enterprises,...
You’ve got to love that mid-’70s fad for making films of sitcoms, even ones that, like this feuding funeral directors farce, weren’t...
Fun if decidedly unoriginal melding of The Haunting and The Stone Tape, with scientific investigator Clive ‘Potsworth and Co.’ Revill leading a...
Ham on wry!
Peter Sellers is Robert Danvers, a vain, rotten telly personality not too unlike Wee Sonny MacGregor from The Naked Truth. Unfortunately, unlike...
The unappealing coupling of Ethel Merman and Donald O’Connor put the mockers on this hoary old showbiz love triangle musical from the...
Frank Poole off of 2001 conspires with Elke Sommer to rob an armoured car from Lee J Cobb’s security company, which turns...
Ah, if ever there was a film of two halves… The quintessential ‘money’s run out’ potboiler from The Carp, which starts off...
Post-Peeping Tom brush-off, the itinerant Michael Powell fetched up in Sydney to create – what else? An Italian neo-realist romantic comedy. The...
Kooky, noisy ‘ain’t life crazy’ comedy with Charles Grodin as a stuffy school principal with an increasingly nutzo teacher wife who accepts...
In which Gus van Zandt pours Daddies sauce on a selection of hats after discovering he’d been beaten to the shot-for-shot-only-nowhere-near-as-good Hitchcock...
The 1978 effort starring Robert Powell as Richard Hannay getting framed for murder, uncovering a plot to kick-start World War I then...
Granted, this delirious product of the long-running Stanley Long-Derek Ford partnership is unlikely to owe its disjointed, spaced-out nature to close semiotic...
‘Like a circle in a spiral…’ It’s either Elaine Paige coming on after the second sketch in a Two Ronnies special or...
"Goodbye, old frying pan..."
One of those lurid cod-psychological thrillers made in the wake of Spellbound, here with Joanne Woodward exhibiting a trio of turnabout temperaments...
Who else could rein in the conflicting primal forces of Selleck, Guttenberg and Danson but the cool, calculating Nimoy? Interesting thing, our...
The Salkind brothers made this version starring Michael ‘Logan’ York as D’Artagnan, Richard ‘Island Son’ Chamberlain as Aramis, Frank ‘turkeys’ Finlay as...
Don Ameche is a singing D’Artagnan in this old spoofy swashbuckler, but never mind him as, playing three cooks who get hilariously...
Nyuk, nyuk, and indeed, nyuk.
Barry Mahon’s production of the inch-high folktale. For those still in blissful ignorance, Mahon was a WWII flying ace and Stalag Luft...
This is the second of the big screen Supermarionation spin-offs, after Thunderbirds Are Go! which is famous for featuring a) Bob Monkhouse...
The 'highlight' in this fiercely unmemorable mess is a scantily-clad Hempel being captured by a gang of Marxist chefs and whipped with...
The first big screen outing for Johnny Speight’s legendary bigot Alf Garnett played, as on television, by Warren Mitchell. All of the...
Of all the Jack the Ripper films that have been turned out over the years we must say this is one of...
This is how children’s fantasy should be – genuinely fantastic, avoiding (or, where possible, upturning) all the sword and sorcery cliches, and...
British-made but Canadian-set one-locationer about a boy who gets stuck in a bank’s airtight, time-controlled safe, and the earnest frowning men in...
A prime slice of ‘getting sci-fi classics all wrong’ fun ensues with this well-worn “re-imagining” of Wells wherein Rod Taylor uses a...
The film about Audie Murphy, America’s most decorated WWII GI, which made him a star in his own right and lead to lots...
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