Gurning, Roland Rat-voiced ON THE BUSES Blakey (STEPHEN LEWIS) goes off the buses to start new life in Costa Del Sol devoting...
BRAZENLY BONKERS kids comedy from the loony pen of DENISE "DO NOT ADJUST" COFFEY
ONE-OFF TRY-OUT kids comedy affair with ELAINE STRITCH and others doing WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?-style suggestions-from-the-audience improv.
ALLISON FISKE divorces hapless MARTIN SHAW.
SMOOTH-TONGUED SORCERESS sat about chanting while "Broom" did domestic chores and "Black Cat" grudgingly supplied endless whiskers for making spells.
GRAVY-LUMPENING SUNDAY lunchtime fare
TISWASIANS JOHN GORMAN and CLIVE WEBB, plus ex-WHO DARES WINS JULIA HILLS, oversaw this typically gunge-graced gagathon, capped with a theme tune,...
KIDS SLAPSTICK teatime affair
HOMER SIMPSON-IDOLISING Hunathon involving dopey Nazi kommandants getting their arse kicked by wise-cracking wacky Yanks for 168,000 episodes.
A Yorkshire schools' morning stalwart.
SHOP-WINDOW-ABUSING FUNSTER HARRY WORTH didn't last long in this sitcom
MORE ANTIPODEAN antics, this time by way of their answer to James Bond.
Yes, it's the bog standard (the operative word there being "yes") Tough Dirty Harry Cop Partners Female Cop routine.
MARIONETTE ESCAPADES of a boy elephant
LOLLOPING LASSIE/LITTLEST HOBO heroic dogathon, only this time - hey! - the dog commentates on the action!
FOLLOWING PHIL "BUSTER" COLLINS's example, entire world criminal fraternity emigrates to island paradise.
BIG FUCK-OFF bran tub of real-life disasters
MILLINERY FILMFAIR fun
Shite.
MISERABLE BASTARD MICHAEL PARKINSON of all people did this series about some old-fashioned Yorkshire dog-things called John Wooley, Elton and Gaylord.
UNASHAMEDLY TACKY science-is-fun endeavour
TWO COUPLES share a house. Imagine what could happen!
DOUGLAS ADAMS-PENNED Dutch cartoon of Doolittlesque Snuggles MD
CELIA HOYLES and ROB "TEETH" BUCKMAN presented various dracketty old "brainteasers" and "mental games" to a less-than-appreciative studio audience of pensioners and...
ONCE MORE UNTO Edwardian England for another bout of tears'n'trauma drawing room dramatics.
CRIME FIGHTING jet setter rich git ROBERT WAGNER is Jonathan Hart ("He's quite a guy!") while STEPHANIE POWERS is his missus Jennifer
DOUBLE JEOPARDY and no fucking mistake.
TITANIC UPHILL STRUGGLE between two equally unimpressive vocations jostling perilously inside the one man
GLOOMY THRILLER, another spin on the we're-all-doomed pitch
THE QUARTERPIPE! ENDOES!
DAVID "RAPIDLY LOSING HIS KID LICENCE" JENSEN hosted this bizarre geographical quiz from atop a crane-mounted armchair which floated over the studio,...
COMES WITH a faintly ridiculous semi-mystical, hushed tones, doff-your-hat air nowadays
PISTOL-PACKING MASKED MARAUDER who demanded "your money or your life" decision-making from coach-bound rich folk.
WIDOWED MILLIONAIRE adopts two black kids, Willis and Arnold (GARY COLEMAN, purveyor of wisecrackery and "brave" illness-baiting stance), to go with ever-superfluous...
HERE'S A weird one.
A CONTRADICTION in terms, surely?
MIDDLE CLASS MITHERING from put-upon pater PATRICK CARGILL
The Central Junior Television Workshop presents!
ALIEN DIMENSION terrorises sleepy rural village via a secret space research lab.
LAMENTABLE SEQUEL to ROMANY JONES
AVERAGE AMBASSADORCOM with ANGELA "MR TYLER!" THORNE as the eponymous Foreign Office consul
NOT THAT there was anything very young about them.
VERY EAGER "Hey! Let's make stuff!" bazaar for holiday mornings, presented by tomboyish SHEELAGH GILBEY, supposed "Editor" of the "Do It supplement"...
YES, YOU read that right.
TOP NOTCH TEETH-CUTTING playground for Messrs IDLE, JONES and PALIN, with DAVID JASON and DENISE COFFEY along for the ride.
NEXT LINK IN THE Micro chain
SMASHING WWII bomb disposal expert saga with ANTHONY "BRIDESHEAD" ANDREWS and MAURICE ROEVES heading a team of sappers clearing up Adolf's mess...
IN TRUTH, one big long prelude to infinitely superior THE PRISONER
ITV'S ANSWER to GRANDSTAND, of course.
IT'S 5.15PM, work's over, Thames have fucked off, "and dealing the first hand of the weekend, right on time, Bruce Forsyth."
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