Posts Tagged With 'Norman Rossington'

Rise And Rise Of Michael Rimmer, The

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1970, and voters face an unedifying choice between a tired old Labour government and a slightly prannyish Tory challenger in a political climate that’s fast becoming 99% froth. The time seems right for Peter Cook, John Cleese, Graham Chapman and director Kevin Billington to lift the British political satire out of its comfy old constituencies of class war and union bashing and cock a snook at the emerging cult of the opinion pollster.

Cook, as the titular mercurial time and motion man, enters the ineptly run Fairbairn advertising agency literally from nowhere, and starts shaking up the complacent staff by standing about in the gents with a clipboard. The slug-abed likes of John Cleese and Arthur Lowe don’t take well to their comfy routine of in-office ballroom dancing and test match viewing being interrupted by pesky efficiency, but when the company starts actually showing some signs of success (through a pornographic TV campaign for Olde English humbugs) Rimmer leapfrogs them with ease and sets about establishing opinion poll dominance for the firm by nobbling Denholm Elliott’s rival firm as they survey the religious propensities of the folk of Nuneaton. (Result: 42% Buddhist.)

From then it’s a small matter to nobble politics itself, manipulating both Labour and Conservatives from the sidelines, joining the latter himself and rising through the ranks to high office. There, Rimmer unveils his masterstroke: the introduction of hourly compulsory electronic voting for the populace on every single policy issue, after which he just sits back and waits for the people, sick of their lives being interrupted by the flashing red light on the front room voting terminal, to beg him to form a dictatorship and make all the pesky democracy stop.

As a Well Made Film it stinks – sketch follows sketch with little regard for shape, characters are paper-thin and drop out of the action as soon as their satirical point’s been made – but for sheer prescience (not least predicting the surprise 1970 Tory election victory – sadly the distributors got cold feet and held off releasing it until after the poll) it’s in a class of its own. Bits of business come thick and fast, and some are great: the slapstick sabotaging of a live Party Political broadcast, some overexcited ‘big desk’ election night coverage, and a high tech defence system straight out of Thunderbirds. As you’d expect, an endless succession of acting stalwarts parade before the camera, many of them great fun. Arthur Lowe’s bumbling advertising placeman and Denholm Elliott’s unscrupulous Peter Niss are excellent, as are Ronald Fraser, channeling Ted Heath via Harold MacMillan as the easily-led over-emotional ‘compassionate’ conservative leader and George A Cooper as the Wilsonian pipe-smoking, fireside-chatting, smugly insincere Labour chief.

Elsewhere, topical cameos about: Graham Crowden’s agnostic bishop is a take on the infamously doubting Bishop of Woolwich; Jerry Ram’s bent far-left activist Ranjit X takes the piss out of Tariq Ali; Ronald Culver’s fuming racist (“Are we mad??”) is Enoch Powell to a tee, and Harold Pinter’s supercilious chat show host Steven Hench could be taken for a David Frost parody, if Rimmer himself wasn’t so clearly an embodiment of Frostie’s rise-without-trace, from Cook’s blank-eyed offensive charm, through a decidedly Frostesque VIP breakfast party at London Zoo, right up to an uncannily accurate recreation of his modish front room (brave stuff, considering Frost’s Paradine Films initiated the project in the first place).

It’s very much one of those bitty, slightly flaky 1970s British comedy films, to be sure, but unlike, say, Rentadick, there are some sharp ideas and great lines among the shapeless mass of random incidents and cameoing comedians. And it’s the only film where Cook’s much debated acting ability is matched to his role: he glides through the film as if on castors, while everyone around him knocks themselves out. Just like Rimmer himself, he bakes his own cake and eats it, backed by a brilliantly swinging theme tune from John ‘Psychomania‘ Cameron. Super!

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Nurse On Wheels

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Aka – wait for it – Carry On, Nurse On Wheels. Oh, yes. This Rogers/Thomas extra-currucular romp (it even has Norman Hudis on script and Eric Rogers on scoring duties) features Esma ‘Flo’ Cannon to the fore as the mum of rookie district nurse Juliet ‘Jack’ Mills, with Jim Dale in a caravan, Deryck Guyler, Joan Sims, Norman Rossington and George ‘Inigo’ Woodbridge.

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I Only Arsked

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Long running smash hit ITV series The Army Game (1957) was so ubiquitous its film version only had to be called after the catchphrase of one of its lead characters, namely Popeye Popplewell played by the great Bernard Bresslaw, for the audience to know what is was about. Scripted by eventual Up Pompeii and Carry On… writer Sid Colin, the premise was the interaction of useless National Service recruits with their dreadful superiors and each other. Since National Service was still mandatory, it’s easy to see where the appeal of the show lay. But even without the shared experience of holding back the Russian hordes by peeling potatoes in Aldershot, this is still well worth the effort of circling in marker on the very rare occasions it crops up in afternoon telly scheduling. The cast on their own can’t fail to please, with Alfie Bass as Excused Boots Bisley (who went on with eventual Sergeant-Major Snudge played by the great Bill Fraser to star in his own telly spin-off, Bootsie And Snudge), David Lodge as Sergeant Potty Chambers, Norman Rossington as Cupcake Cook and assorted other players including Michael Bentine, Michael Ripper and Charles Hawtrey. Like Life With The Lyons, it’s a Hammer production. It’s often thought that venerable name in British film production, most commonly associated with horror, only got into the way of making sitcom spin-offs when the velvet-lined arse fell out of the bottom of the coffin of the Dracula business. But as demonstrated here, this is not the case.

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Wrong Box, The

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The definitive Sunday afternoon film, equally ideal for our patented ‘timing the Sunday roast by Sir Rich Ralphardson’s antics’ scheme, or a bit later in the day when it crops up on telly in the post-prandial plopped-on-the-pouffe slot. Sit back and lap up Sellers’ catnip quack, Pete and Dud’s pony and trap-piloting shifties with a thing about, er, ‘thing’, Wilfrid Lawson’s magnificently tenebrous butler to a just-about-bearably wimpish Mick Mucklebrass, Tony Hancock morosely plodding after all and sundry, and at the centre of it all, are John Mills and Rich Ralphardson as the tontine totterers, shambling from train wreck to graveside, the latter bewildering cabbies and serial killers alike with his constant stream of Potteresque blether. Is it really that good, though? Have the long years since we last properly sat down in front of it submerged the memory of the doubtless prevalent longeurs, leaving only the proud summits of the opening montage, the train crash and Peter Sellers going ‘Come in!’ poking gingerly above the surface of the amnemonic lagoon? Well, your guess is as good as ours (and probably rather less stupidly phrased to boot), but we’re willing to bet a strangler’s ransom it still comes up fresh as paint. Oh, and there’s no avoiding it with this one we’re afraid, so pardon us while we list rather alarmingly – Jeremy ‘Have Been Watching’ Lloyd, James ‘Double Kill’ Villiers, Graham ‘Cranes’ Stark, Nicholas ‘Goes to you, Clement’ Parsons, Willoughby ‘And Did Those Feet..?’ Goddard, Valentine ‘Just follow the humming’ Dyall, Leonard ‘Dog Ends’ Rossiter, Timothy ‘Mayfly and the Frog’ Bateson, Avis ‘Everybody Say Cheese’ Bunnage, Cicely ‘Buses’ Courtneidge, Peter ‘Not the Airplane! one’ Graves, Irene ‘Fruitbat’ Handl, The Late Great John ‘Relevance Factor’ Junkin, John ‘File It Under Fear’ Le Mesurier, Nanette ‘Contractual obligation’ Newman, Norman ‘People want big things!’ Rossington, Marianne ‘Temps’ Stone, Thorley ‘A real live Russian! They let you out, do they?’ Walters, André ‘Rillington’ Morell, The Temperance Seven, and the Bournemouth Strangler is played by the bloke who choreographed the meths drinkers in Theatre of Blood, in one of those perilously petty coincidences that warms our cockles but seems to freeze everyone else’s, judging by the silence that’s just descended on the room. Ho hey. ‘Slackly directed’, the critical nits aver, copying furiously from that last film guide to use that exact phrase. Well, Forbsy’s no Hitch, we’d be the first to admit, but then The Thirty-Nine Steps this manifestly ain’t. It’s a pitch-perfect Sunday afternoon film, a neglected genre of which certain gluepot hacks seem to have little knowledge. Not that we should really be surprised at that, mind. You can see the TV aerials too, but who bloody cares?

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Night to Remember, A

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The proper Titanic film, of course, in which Kenneth More, Honor Blackman, Kenneth Griffith, David McCallum, Geoffrey ‘Catweazle’ Bayldon, Bee ‘are you saying ‘Ni!’ to that old woman?’ Duffel, Gerald ‘Adamant’ Harper, Andrew ‘Quatermass’ Keir, Stratford ‘Barlow’ Johns, Desmond ‘Q’ Llewelyn, Derren ‘Special Branch’ Nesbitt and Norman ‘Simon Simon’ Rossington all conspicuously fail to wear white trousers with racoon-tail key rings on their belts, invent the moonwalk and stiffly mime pouring a drink in front of a bunch of bewildered-looking teenagers who only came to see Depeche Mode.

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Long Distance Piano Player, The

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Ray goes into winsome eulogy about a fox And, yes, still more fox-related musings

A dingy municipal hall in a nondescript northern town plays host to Pete (Ray Davies) a phenomenon, a true one-off of Herculean proportions – at least, according to his loudmouth, cod-American manager Jack Burnshaw (Norman Rossington). Over the next few days, as Jack barks at nonplussed townsfolk through a megaphone while his gofer Alf (James ‘Red Shift’ Hazeldine) bangs resignedly on a drum, Pete will be attempting to break the record for non-stop piano playing. Why, apart from the ‘uniqueness’ of the achievement, no-one can be quite sure, least of all Pete’s long-suffering wife Ruth (Lois Daine) holed up in a makeshift bedroom for the duration, within earshot of the relentless drone of Pete’s playing. Locals seem none to bothered either – two old duffers dusting down the snooker tables in the hall chat idly about him because – well, he’s being talked about, apparently. Audience members come to witness the freak, make fun and shout out confusing requests. Much speculation on either of the couple ‘going without’ while the marathon continues is loudly made.

A gang of youths headed by Ken ‘Just a Boy’s Game’ Hutchison intimidate Pete’s girl and break into the hall at night, almost forcing Pete to stop until Jack storms in and beats them into submission. But as time passes, and Pete’s playing slips from a medley of recognisable tunes into a relentless atonal stew, things fall apart of their own accord. Ruth demands he choose between his pointless record attempt and her. Doesn’t he love her? Pete’s reply is as incoherent as his playing. Then she confronts Jack about his exploitation, but Jack, his transatlantic accent slipping as he tenses, remains adamant that he is the only one who matters to Pete. And so the marathon wears on, with Pete’s fingers bandaged, and shaves and sponge baths taken in situ with the help of the ever-eager Alf. Finally, however, Pete snaps, and puts down his bandaged hands, running past an irate Jack to fall – rather spectacularly by way of the fire escape – into Ruth’s arms.Weatherbeaten and wasted, he takes the promise of life over empty achievement in the end.

Writer Alan Sharp freely admitted this story was based on Horace McCoy’s depression-era novel They Shoot Horses, Don’t They?, which was coincidentally being made into a Hollywood film at the same time this was in production (an earlier radio version of the play predates the film entirely). The play shares with that film the same flaw in its one-note allegory – how easy is it to care for the characters, or try and anticipate their moves, once the metaphor has been set in motion? Davies, while certainly no revelation in the acting stakes, does at least come into his own as the days wear him down – when he sings to Alf a giddy, weary song Marathon (an original Davies composition for the film) the flight from sanity is clearly underway. Lois Daine copes well with her scenes, especially the showdown with Jack, in which Norman Rossington also proves himself a capable actor above and beyond the comic turn his mutton-chopped, tight-pullover-wearing demagogue seems in the early scenes.

As appropriate to a story concerning the balance on the razor edge of sanity, wayward director Philip Saville turns in one of his more ‘together’ productions, brilliantly racking up the claustrophobic tension in the interior scenes, and photographing the back-to-back terrace locations with a sharp eye for their relentless, maze-like oppression. (The exercise bars folded into the walls of the hall-cum-gym are likewise framed to give a sense of Pete being a ‘caged animal’, fortunately without the point being rammed home too forcefully.) Only twice does the over-exuberance that would later scupper overblown outings like The Rainbirds (qv) surface – a short Bunuel rip-off fantasy sequence showing Pete dragging a piano up a hill, and a final piece of film footage showing a fox racing through woodland, to illustrate a rather half-baked bit of symbolism from earlier in the story (Pete had been repeatedly babbling about ‘seeing a fox once’ to Alf). While this first outing for the renamed strand is far from a classic, and doesn’t provide a great deal to think about after the credits have rolled past to the strains of the Kinks’ Got to Be Free, the atmosphere of the piece is undeniably affecting, and there’s certainly more to recommend it than mere curiosity at seeing Ray Davies act.

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Big Jim and the Figaro Club

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SIX-PART 50S-SET-AND-STYLE capery with NORMAN ROSSINGTON, ROLAND CURRAM and JIGSAW’S SYLVESTER McCOY, appearing here as SYLVESTE (sic) MCCOY, tracking their adventures around a housing estate making life miserable for a snobbish and rather officious council officer. Catchphrase: “One for Figaro…every bugger for Figaro”.

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Curry and Chips

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RUMPUS-ROUSING MILLIGANISM with Spike as (sigh) blacked-up worker Paki-Paddy, ERIC SYKES as woolly liberal foreman, KENNY LYNCH as anti-Asian racist and NORMAN ROSSINGTON as a white bigot. Fun for all the family!

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