TV Cream’s first stab at a podcast is now available. And you can listen to it here…

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Or download from here. It’s 75MB and, once saved to your own computer, will sit snugly in any media-playing device and run for about 54 minutes.

54 minutes of what, you may be wondering, before venturing to cock an ear, or even two.

Well, it’s a journey into stereophonic sound of all forms. Over 100 pieces of music turn up, some in unusual contexts, some in surprising hybrids, some written and performed by our own hand, some with annoying talking and shouting over the top.

But it’s not merely a glorified playlist of TV Cream favourites.

For starters, there’s a very special guest, who performs live in the studio. There are a few of what we’re calling theme sandwiches, delectable helpings of aural sustenance served in unlikely and, as it turns out, controversial taste sensations. There’s also a bit where two themes go head-to-head in what we’re not calling theme wars, the war of the themes.

The bulk of the podcast, however, is taken up with four exciting features. Here are some liner notes for anyone interested in lines:

Scene-setters

This is a complicated item that listeners may find hard to understand, so let’s see if it can be made simpler. There have been examples of music used on TV programmes that act not merely to compound title sequences with clusters of melodic and harmonic notation but contextualise and to an extent hypertextualise the subsequent transmission to a degree that prepares the viewer in both a moral and mental capacity for what they are about to ingest and thereby heightens those physiological sensations nurtured by latent synaptic pulses charged by the notion of cause and effect. These pieces of music are called scene-setters in that they cultivate and orientate our expectations around a particular manifestation of emotion thereby setting us up for an eventuality or scene that is shortly indeed almost immediately to unfold.

It’s also got loads of good TV themes in.

A Stack of Macca

The 10 best songs by Paul McCartney.

You’ve Made Your Musical Bed, Now You’ve Got To Lie In It

A guide to those ubiquitous tunes and samples that crop up as incidental music on innumerable documentaries and reality shows.

Riddle-me-Ron Grainer

Thrill to the sound of one man presenting another man with some Facts Amazing about the bloke who did the theme to Dr Who and challenging him to say whether they are true or false.

And that’s it. You can tell us what you think about the whole roustabout by emailing scene@tvcream.co.uk.